


Secrets

by captainamergirl



Category: One Life to Live
Genre: F/M, Rare Pairings, affair, secrets and lies
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-05-15
Updated: 2020-05-15
Packaged: 2021-03-03 05:55:30
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 865
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/24190015
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/captainamergirl/pseuds/captainamergirl
Summary: You know that old saying –it’s so wrong but it yet feels so right…?It may be a cliché but it’s also so true. At least, that’s how I feel every time I am with Greg...
Relationships: Greg Evans/Rachel Gannon





	Secrets

**Secrets**   
  
You know that old saying –  _it’s so wrong but it yet feels so right…?_ It may be a cliché but it’s also so true. At least, that’s how I feel every time I am with Greg like this. Here is he, between my thighs, pounding into my body, filling up the emptiness there, as I wrap my legs around his waist and hold on for dear life. I don’t want to let go, not for a second. I know I said it before but I have to be done with him this time. I have to be for Shaun’s sake.   
  
Greg murmurs my name right before he's digging his teeth into the sensitive skin of my neck. He is gliding into me easily because I am so wet down there. No one ever made me feel this turned on before. No one ever had that power.   
  
I rock in time with him, imagining what it would like to be allowed to do this anytime I felt like it. Not for it to be the dirty little secret it is. I imagine it would be wonderful if I could tell the world “I love Greg Evans. I love him so damn much!” But I can’t. So instead this remains a dark, dirty liaison. It’s an affair. Greg wants to tell Shaun but I know Shaun would never understand. Hell, I don’t even understand sometimes why I want this man between my legs so much that I am willing to go behind everyone’s backs for him. But then he touches me just right and I remember. I remember why I fell so hard for him so fast. There’s this hidden part of him that no one ever sees but me. He makes me feel special, loved, like a true woman. Shaun and I hold hands and kiss once in a while but with Greg I have it all. I have everything but the ability to be proud of what I am doing.   
  
We rock in rhythm for a good long time but it’s not nearly long enough because I know I have to let him go. After this, it’s over. It has to be over. The last thing I want is to hurt Shaun when he’s been so amazing to me. The last thing I want is to destroy his burgeoning sibling relationship with Greg. I can’t stand to see the two men I love at odds over me. And I do love Shaun. I am just not  _in_ love with him. But he definitely deserves so much more than he’s getting from me and his brother. Sometimes I think I would be doing him a favor if I told him about Greg and me. He would then be free to find someone who loves him wholly and completely in every way. But then I know he would never forgive Greg. He would never get over it. What if he even got so upset he hurt Greg? Shaun is a gentleman but he would probably relish pounding Greg into the ground for this betrayal. I wouldn’t exactly blame him.   
  
Greg wraps his arms around me and holds me tightly against his sweaty, hard, naked body. I try to savor the moment, memorize it, so I have it with me always in my memory and heart. He can see something is wrong and asks me about it. I swear I’m just tired. He whispers he loves me against my ear lobe and then drifts off to sleep. I wait until he’s snoring softly to slowly extract my aching body from his embrace. I watch him for a long moment sleeping so peacefully. How can he sleep so easily and so comfortably when we are hurting his brother every time we're together like this? I haven’t slept normally since it all started weeks ago.    
  
For a brief moment, I resent Greg for the way he can compartmentalize (he always says we are separate from Shaun, that he isn’t apart of us when we’re together) and lie to himself. But I still love him. God, I love him. I don’t want him to be my secret anymore but I am not strong enough to face the sure to be devastating consequences.   
  
So with tears in my eyes, I grab my clothes and get dressed hurriedly. I grab my purse and start for the door. I quickly turn around though and walk over to Greg, pressing my lips gently in a butterfly-soft kiss to his cheek. He doesn’t move, he just keeps right on sleeping.   
  
I then turn and walk to the door. I slowly poke my head out, checking the hallway for anyone who might recognize me. I feel weak with heartbreak but I realize I can’t stay with Greg forever. That the world won’t stop turning just so we can be together.   
  
No one will ever find out what we’ve done. I’ll make sure of it. I just wish he didn’t have to be my deepest secret… I wish with all my heart I could tell the world I love Greg Evans.    
  
But it’s not meant to be. It’s a secret I will take to my grave.   
  
FIN


End file.
